Overcoming Betrayal – MKMMA Week 10

Well… they say that confession is good for the soul so I’m here for a clean slate. So there was this guy that I knew. I’ve known him for as long as I can remember though I can’t say that I knew him well at all. He’s one of those guys that has always been there but tended to fade more into the background so he was never really front and center in my mind.

One thing that kind of struck me about him was that he seemed to have quite a lot of potential. I remember hearing from him about ideas that he had and plans for the future. He always had some sort of project on the go or a goal in mind. I always liked hearing about this sort of stuff, actually. His ideas were always pretty interesting. Here’s where the problem came in, though…

I was not a very good friend to him. You know how friends are always supposed to look out for you? They are supposed to help you along and support you? Well, that’s not how I acted.

Honestly, looking back, it was a little more like sabotage. There were times that I would shoot him a look and actually talk him out of dreams and goals that he had. Sometimes I would keep him up late on the computer even though he had important meetings the next day. When he had important projects to work on I would often distract him with games or other things that would just waste his time. Since I knew him from when we were kids I would sometimes bring up old memories of things that he had messed up. I remember one specific time where he was trying to focus on his health and I even went so far as to keep a bunch of junk food in the cupboards to tempt him with and when he was tired I even talked him out of a few of his workouts. These things sound terrible, I’m sure, and they are only a few examples. There are many more.

Honestly, I’m not even sure why I did those things. Part of me, a big part, really wanted for him to succeed… For some reason, though, I just kept holding him back.

Here’s the good news… I’ve gotten to know him better. In fact, we’ve started to make a real connection. More than ever I want for him to become all that he can be. I’m doing everything that I can to help him now. No longer am I sabotaging his efforts. We’re working as a team now and it’s great.

So who was the guy that I was working against those many times? Well, it was actually my future self. It’s hard to believe, but studies have actually shown that when people think of their future self their brain activity is as though they are thinking of a stranger. As a result, because of this disconnect, we can often make choices that will make life harder for ourselves tomorrow, or next week, or next month or next year. When you start to connect with your future self, though, everything changes.

You no longer want to sabotage that person. You are no longer willing to steal from your future self in order to make today a little easier or a little more comfortable. You naturally start wanting, and doing, what is best for your future self. It’s a beautiful thing, really.

So how about you? How do you relate to your future self? How are you treating your future self? Do you offer yourself the same kindness, compassion and generosity that you offer to everybody else? I certainly hope so because there’s one thing that I know for sure…

That person that you see in the mirror…

They can deserve and appreciate every kindness that you can give them.

Cheers to your success ~ Daniel